careers in tv news - anchor

1.45 AM - wake up

2 AM -  get picked up by office cab

3 AM - reach the office (which exists in a far flung suburb of your city)

3 AM-3.30 AM - Brush teeth inside office loo, drink pure, authentic, deliciously non-flavoured generic coffee from the office coffee machine, check emails

3.30 AM - 4AM - read up for your bulletin

4 AM - go for make-up

5 AM - return from make-up, looking oh-so-delicious at 5 fucking AM, complete with a fancy formal coat (but wearing your ratty jeans and bathroom chappals)

5 AM - 5.45 AM - read up more for your bulletin, write catchy headlines, keep checking with the assistant producer if your progress is ok

5.45 AM - go to the studio, stand under the lights, smile, look beautiful (hide your ratty jeans and bathroom chappals behind your desk so that the audience won't notice)

5.59 AM- 6.25 AM - ON AIR (and feel supremely flustered at every single mistake you make - and get yelled at by the studio director in between breaks and once the show is over for your impeccably miserable performance of looking stellar while stumbling in spite of the teleprompter)

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But who will watch news at 5.59AM in the morning?

Your mummy and daddy, of course.

careers in tv news - ticker desk

Disclaimer: The ticker is the stream of text that runs at the bottom of the tv screen and repeats itself ad nauseum.

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When they recruit you, you are told that this is the most important desk in the organisation. Every single day thereafter, you are told that the ONLY thing viewers are interested in reading is the ticker.

You spend your time trying to fit the latest news into a space of 20 characters - this includes spaces. You must do this faster than your counterparts working at other news channels. This is regardless of the fact that viewers watch only one channel at a time and will never really know which channel gave has the latest news on air zero point ten seconds before the other. In no circumstance, however, must you ever point out the logic of this fact to your boss.

You spend all nine hours of your shift glued to your seat. You cannot eat, drink, breathe or take a break. If you do, you might miss the breaking news.
(You have probably typed the words 'BREAKING NEWS' more times than you have ever written your name. .... or even your lover's name. )

The one day that you took a break to pee, your boss yelled at you when you returned. You had to say, " I am sorry that I went to pee." And she said - "That is not the point. You missed the breaking news."

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Disclaimer #2: You also have to press a button called "Fire Ticker". If you forget to press this button, the ticker doesn't run. You are the ultimate mover and shaker of all things newsworthy. Ad nauseum.